I’ve always felt there are two versions of me.
One is kind and loving, helpful and reliable, curious and child-like and a bit mischievous. The other is insufferable – egotistical, demanding, competitive, and self absorbed. All the successes in my life are due to the work of Good Marc. Every failure bears the fingerprint of Bad Marc. We’re often told to “love ourselves”. Because of these two personas, I love and hate myself at the same time.
My Mother has the same two sides to her personality. For most of her life the good side prevailed. As a result she’s blessed with a loving family and countless friends and admirers. But sadly, over the last year, the good part has faded and the bad part now dominates.
She can’t see any of this happening. It’s destroying everything but yet it’s entirely invisible to her. But I see it all, in full color and slow motion. The question is: what will I learn from it?