Yesterday, my friend Ali tweeted a lovely original limerick about Node.js and invited his followers to contribute more. Challenge accepted.
There once was a Dev from Lode,— Ali Afshar (@aliafshar) April 4, 2021
Who wrote back-end servers in node.
They refused to condemn
That beast npm,
Original programming limericks please...
Here are my contributions, along with translations for non-programmers (TfNP):
There was a young man from Spain.
Java, he sought to explain.
But his students got stuck,
Asked him “what in the fuck,
is a public static void main()"?
TfNP: Java forces inscrutible syntax onto the most basic beginners.
Young Bjarne was not one to cuss
But one day he raised quite a fuss
Said he “I find it crass
That C has no class,
So I think I’ll invent C plus plus”
TfNP: Bjarne Stroustrup created C++ because it’s predecessor, C, lacked object oriented features, aka classes.
Mr. Eich, co-founder of Mozilla
Thought it would be quite a thrilla
If, in ten frantic days,
The web’s six thousand pound gorilla
Mr. Pike had reached a plateau
Discovered Python was too slow
The powers that be
Told him no lunch is free
So he said “Then I’ll take mine to Go”
TfNP: Frustrated with Python build times for Google production services, Rob Pike invented the Go programming language.
There once was a guy named Ritchie
Who wanted to make programs easy
Said he “I am sad
Languages are so bad
But now I am able to C!”
TfNP: Dennis Ritchie created the C programming language to make it easier to write system programs. Unix, the precursor to Linux, was written in C by Ritchie, Ken Thompson, and a host of collaborators. Fifty years later, C is still one of the world’s most popular programming languages.
An arrogant techbro named Earl
Said “my code is a joy to unfurl”
But no one could say
If his claim was okay
Because he’d been coding in Perl
TfNP: Perl lives up to the moniker “code”. Alan Turing wouldn’t understand most Perl programs.
Mr. Wall said “my code makes me hurl,
So I’ll give code design a good whirl!”
He mixed up some piles
Of Scrabble game tiles
The result, as we know, is called Perl.
TfNP: Again, Perl is a write-only programming language.